The Fear of Driving

I've been having panic attacks for about 3 years now. It all started on a hot summer day when I was driving back from a physical that I had in Beechwood. They had drawn some blood which freaks me out anyway, and this time was especially bad because I could hear my blood filling up the vile. I was driving on 480, which is now my nemesis, and I started feeling weird. I thought that it was just low blood sugar because I hadn't eaten that morning. I felt a wave go through me and then I thought for sure I was going to black out. I had to pull over on the side of the highway. I was sweating, my heart was pounding and I was scared to death. I was close to an exit, so I pulled off searching for a convenience store. One was close, so I got a candy bar and a pop in an attempt to feel better. That day, I had to be picked up and driven to my destination because I could not calm down.

After a few months, things calmed down and I was able to talk myself down when I felt the panic coming upon me. It was fine for a couple years with just a slight feeling of weirdness sometimes.

Now they are back with a vengeance and for the past 6-9 months I have had moments of real panic. For a while, I thought it was caffeine affecting me, but I cut it out and was still having the effects. While I'm driving on the highway, I get over sensitized to my surroundings, then feel weird, which turns into a feeling that I'm going to black out and wreck. I have to stay in the right lane most of the time so that I feel like I have an exit.

I went to a doctor recently and she prescribed me Buspirone, which is supposed to help with the anxiety. It's been 3 weeks now and unfortunately, I don't feel any more calm. Plus when I take the pill in the morning, I feel like electric shocks are going through my body and I get light headed for about 15-25 minutes.

I always knew I was a little crazy, but now it's confirmed. My brain is going haywire! I would like to end this post with a photo of me from Costa Rica last year - enjoy!