21.8.08

Mind Over Bladder


I pee a lot. I mean all the time. If I have a can of soda or any large quantity of fluid, I'll be in the bathroom several times that day. I've gotten used to it to the point that I don't really notice anymore. It's just a part of my life. The worst part is at night. Usually I will eat dinner or a snack that has a lot of salt, so I will get really thirsty and drink a lot before bed. It's a vicious cycle, which causes me to get out of bed about 5-10 times. On a good night, I might only get up 1 or 2 times. Seriously.
I think I've developed a sixth sense about finding a bathroom in a new place. And if I've been there before, I know where the bathroom is and I remember what it was like. I find bathrooms to be pretty interesting sometimes. For the most part, businesses try to have really nice, clean bathrooms these days. I was in a Starbucks bathroom today and it appears that someone really put some time into the layout and style of it. It was very spacious and comfortable. There are even some port-a-johns out there in which you do not have to hold your breath the whole time you are inside. I used the one by the golf course near our house the other day (we were on a walk and I couldn't wait), and I have to tell you I would consider it a luxury john. They used so much deoderizer in the bowl that you actually couldn't smell the excrement right below you. It was giant, handicapped accessible, and even had a purell dispenser inside. It still makes you feel a little icky, but with that smell of cinnamon wafting through, you can almost forget where you are. Almost.
But there are also some bathrooms that are not pleasant to be in. I think that Wal-Mart bathrooms across the board are horrible. In fact, I have been in a lot of different Wal-Marts and they all have problems. The door locks are broken, they smell like poop, one stall I went in even had poop smeared on the walls. Paper towels are thrown around, the garbages are overflowing, or they are out of soap. And then there's Marc's. I love Marc's but the bathrooms there make you feel like you need a shower after you leave. I don't know if I've ever been in a stall with a lock, let alone a purse holder. The paint in there is always a horrible color like baby puke. And the general level of dirtiness makes you wonder if it is ever cleaned. I'm sure the 15-year olds that work there aren't real concerned about bathroom cleanliness.
So, on that note, I'll sign off................. because I have to pee.

1 comment:

Janice said...

Have you ever been to the Burlington Coat factory bathroom (the old one in Boardman Plaza)? It's probably the worst one I've seen out there. There's only one in the whole store and was clogged up with crap. You can smell it as soon as you enter the store. Useless info, I know. :)

~Janice